It’s happened so often that I feel it’s an unwanted friend.

A commitment that I cannot escape.

The Sisyphisian task of just being.

Depression is it’s true brother, kin-of-my-kin,

And I hate it.

I take full responsibility for my actions.

I try to overcome, but it is so hard.

What am I doing wrong?

I just wish I could succeed more often then I fail.

Maybe next time…

Pain eclipses the modern horizon,

Enveloping the desired limits we place upon

The moments of our lives.

Our senses, idle idiots, partake without participating,

Meander down paths tread countlessly.

Feeling the warmth of pain, the freezing of desire,

The idyllic sense of nothing and everything.

Urgent needs succumbs

Burying dreamscape of yon

Amongst gauzes deviant

Casting shadows of clarity and confusion

A Mind’s acquiesce

Pain, hatched lines of delirium

The connection with humanity

Aching and lounging

Debilitated laziness, pooling unseen

When? Doesn’t matter.

Only, Smile!

Momentous times astound

Waxing eloquent on useless ideas

Bringing thoughts and deeds to fruitless efforts

Wondering why

Shallow breaths of twilight

Lap upon the shores of idle minds

Asking for, demanding, azure substances unknown

Individuals acquiesce to the desires of the self

Glazed eyes focusing and re-focusing

On particles lost in the mind

Of feather fraught with frictionous fictions

Narrowed eyes judge

Bemused and bemuddled minds

Lying in a state of emasculated consciousness

Scream loudly and obnoxiously into the void

I slip into a dream to escape

They find me.

My worries hound my thoughts all day and at night,

When that sweet embrace of unconsciousness cradles me in her arms,

The hounds of worry leap and snarl and I am lost.

I awake to worry. It is everywhere. I am not enough.